This week’s edition of The Upper-Limit Breakthrough Newsletter kicks off a multi-part series deconstructing each element of the destructive mindset programs responsible for keeping you stuck.

You can read the online version here.

Also, check out the Get Unstuck Today Podcast for a daily dose of insight, action, and inspiration to experience an upper-limit breakthrough in less than five minutes.

Imagine your subconscious mind is like a computer running on an old operating system. 

When it was first programmed, it was designed to protect you based on the information available at that time, much like a computer's antivirus software.

However, just as outdated software might struggle with modern security threats and recognition of what truly is a threat, your subconscious mind's definitions of "safe" and "unsafe" are based on outdated experiences and information.

In computer programming, outdated software can cause problems because it doesn't recognize new, legitimate programs and might block them unnecessarily. 

Similarly, operating on old programming, your subconscious mind might block you from new, beneficial experiences because it still perceives them as threats based on past data.

It’s this incongruency between what your subconscious believes is safe and what you consciously recognize to be safe (and desired) that keeps you stuck in a pattern of sabotaging behaviors, feeling like you’re trapped in a hamster wheel of mediocrity.

Even more, this incongruency facilitates the unconscious reactions that leave you constantly recognizing just how much you’re sabotaging your goals…only after it’s too late. 

In this week’s newsletter, you’ll learn what a destructive mindset program is and how and why it came to be. You’ll also see more clearly how these outdated programs negatively influence your word choice, beliefs, and behaviors. 

I’ll detail several example programs that you’ll be familiar with and share action steps you can take to unlearn and upgrade the programs that are no longer serving you.

Let’s dive in. 

Destructive Mindset Programs Defined

[True Story] In 5th grade, I was voted school president. 

I hit the hallways of Twin Ridge hard to campaign for votes.

I also starred in our annual Christmas Talen Show (broadcast on big box TVs in every classroom throughout the school) with my best friend, Nathanial. 

We sang Jingle Bell Rock - acapella.

Yeah, we were that cool.

In fact, our performance was so good that our principal, who had a passion for music and had recently started a school band, invited us to be the lead singers for the band.

We said yes, of course, and spent the next six months practicing so that we could debut at our 5th-grade graduation ceremony.

On the day of our ceremony, I was excited beyond words. As I did one last mic check, I poked my head out from behind the stage curtain and identified my parents in the crowd, who were beaming with joy as they looked at me.

Until this point in my life, I didn’t ever stop talking and had no qualms with speaking in front of five people or 500 people. I loved being in the spotlight and having all eyes on me.

That quickly changed when we began our performance. As I began to sing my first line, I noticed my microphone was off - nobody could hear me. 

I was overcome with panic, embarrassment, and judgment in those two or three seconds. I could see 10-year-old me shrinking and singing without his usual passion for the remainder of the performance.

In hindsight, seeing this moment as silly and insignificant is easy.

But for that 10-year-old boy, it was everything.

My subconscious believed that speaking in front of others wasn't safe to protect me from future embarrassment.

Saying I struggled with public speaking after this would be an understatement - but more on that for a different day. 

This is one example of a Destructive Mindset Program.

A Destructive Mindset Program is an unconscious, automatic reaction to a particular trigger.

When a triggering situation arises, a flood of emotional energy permeates your...

• word choice (self-talk and thoughts) 

• beliefs (about yourself, others, and life)

• behaviors (action and inaction)

• results

• identity (and reality)

Let’s use the example above to break down each of these elements:

• Trigger: having to give presentations in school or at work

• Emotion: anxiety and fear

• Self-Talk: I hate public speaking

• Beliefs: I’m not a good speaker

• Action/Inaction: I passively push through in a cringe-worthy manner

• Results: I feel the speech went poorly, which reinforces the belief I’m not a good public speaker with such a performance

• Reality: I remain stuck, and the cycle continues

• Identity: I’m a poor speaker

This program was formed to keep me safe. 

In this case, this program was formed to save me from future judgment, rejection, or embarrassment. 

These are core fears hardwired into all of us because long ago if this had occurred, we would have run the risk of being ostracized from our tribe, which was a recipe for a short life. 

You’re Hardwired to Survive - Not Thrive

Destructive Mindset Programs are an unconscious, automatic collection of emotions, beliefs, and behaviors that serve as pre-programmed responses to a particular event, person, or circumstance (trigger). 

Your subconscious mind deploys these automatic programs to keep you safe.

Your subconscious mind has one objective: to keep you safe.

It’s designed to ensure you survive, but it becomes your biggest enemy when you focus on wanting to thrive. 

Your subconscious helps maintain safety by keeping you in a pattern of predictability, familiarity, and comfortability.

For centuries, our ancestors relied on each other - our tribes - to survive. As we evolved, our minds became skilled at ensuring we maintained connections and scanning our environment for threats.

Any action that threatened your sense of belonging in your tribe was perceived as unsafe, and we evolved to avoid such actions. 

Fortunately, our ancestors' struggles - starvation, lack of shelter, predators - are no longer primary concerns for most. However, our subconscious hasn't updated accordingly.

And it’s still part of the everyday experience of being a human to feel worrisome and anxiety-provoking thoughts, irrational fears, and intense emotions. 

• It evolved to protect our ancestors from dangers like saber-toothed tigers and starvation.

• It learned to be on constant alert for threats.

• It always believes it’s keeping you safe - always. 

Your subconscious is why the human species still exists today.

As a result of its MO to keep us safe, it’s created three fear-based programs to influence decisions and actions that keep us in a safe and predictable environment:

1. Fear of judgment

2. Fear of abandonment

3. Fear of rejection

Collectively, I call this the Fear JAR. 

Each of these is rooted in survival.

Remember - our ancestor’s lives depended on being a part of the tribe. Anything that risked being kicked out of the tribe induced a deep-rooted sense of fear to serve as a red flag to stop the behavior immediately or risk, well, again, death.

• If your tribe judges you for your behavior, the risk of being kicked out exponentially increases.

• If your tribe does abandon you, well, it’s likely a matter of days before you’re impending death.

• And, of course, if your tribe rejects you, you’re ultimately abandoned, and, well, death.

Bleek times, I know.

I’m right here with you: these seem too primal, simple, and silly to be prevalent today.

But they are.

And, they’re powerful AF.

For instance, if you grew up with just enough to buy a house and start having significant financial success as an adult, you’ll begin to experience a collection of sabotaging behaviors that stem from fear of judgment and rejection.

Additionally, if your family and friend group live an unhealthy lifestyle that’s characterized by being at least 20 pounds overweight and you decide to strike out on your health kick…

Well, fear of rejection, judgment, and abandonment will sink in and play a critical role in creating resistance, keeping you stuck where you were - in a bubble of safety within your tribe.

These three key fears are everywhere, and every goal you’re pursuing that provides resistance in the form of self-sabotaging behavior(s) can be traced back to the Fear JAR.

Your subconscious is the reason that when trying to thrive (despite being programmed to thrive), you experience an invisible gravitational force that holds you back. 

When you begin to make more money, lose weight, get healthy, fall in love, or achieve more success than your default comfort setting, your subconscious deploys several sabotaging behaviors to bring you back to familiarity.

Destructive Mindset Programs Are Designed to Keep You Safe

In my previous newsletter, I discussed your upper-limit problem using the thermostat analogy - refresh yourself here. I used this analogy to demonstrate how you respond when you exceed your usual level of money, love, and success. 

As a quick reminder, imagine your success and happiness as the temperature in your home and your internal beliefs and self-worth as the thermostat that controls it.

• When your thermostat is set to 72 degrees, it maintains that comfortable level. 

• If the temperature rises above 72 degrees, the thermostat kicks on to cool things down and bring the temperature back to the set level.

• When you achieve more success or happiness than your internal thermostat setting, you unconsciously start to "cool things down" by engaging in self-sabotaging behaviors like procrastination, creating conflicts, or making mistakes. 

This is a destructive mindset program in action. 

It’s a defense mechanism deployed by your subconscious to keep you safe.

Take my client MC, for instance, who grew up with a collection of limiting beliefs and scarcity-infused stories around money.

For the first few years of her business, she made less than $10,000 annually. Then, after going all in on mindset and business coaching, she had a $100,000 year.

You’d expect me to tell you how excited she was at achieving such a milestone. Still, the truth is that it was an accomplishment that produced overwhelming anxiety and a slew of short-term sabotaging behaviors. 

This amount of money was not only unfamiliar, it was unsafe.

It was foreign.

It was unknown.

She was overwhelmed with uncertainty and anxiety, which spiraled into thinking she didn’t deserve this amount of money and wasn’t worthy of this amount of success.

This further impacted her work ethic, energy, and the amount - and type - of action she took to continue growing her business.

Through mindset coaching and hypnosis, we cultivated a sense of safety by defusing these toxic emotions, unlearning, and letting go of outdated beliefs that did not serve her. 

Rather than regressing to her previous income, she was able to maintain a pace of steady growth.

I use hypnosis to help entrepreneurs overcome their upper limits and scale their income, happiness, and fulfillment. 

Book a free Upper Limit Breakthrough Strategy Session ​here​.

Your Next Steps

Every newsletter will conclude with a suggested action step and further resources on the topic we discussed.

Today, I encourage you to think about the specific patterns of thought and behavior you’ve engaged in that held you back from breaking through to experience the level of income, success, or love on the other side of your upper limit.

• Do you carelessly spend, make irrational investment choices, or rely on alcohol or other coping mechanisms when you start getting close to an income goal?

• Do you put walls up, practice avoidance, or even cheat on a significant other the moment you two start falling deeper in love?

Reflect on your past through a lens of nonjudgmental curiosity and identify when and how your subconscious deployed a destructive mindset program to keep you safe.

Then, take a moment to see if you can break down each constituent part.

Thank you for reading today’s newsletter.

If you found it valuable, share it with a fellow entrepreneur or business owner who feels stuck in achieving their goals.

You’re one action away from your upper-limit breakthrough.

Until next time,

Paul

P.S. What did you think of today’s newsletter? Reply back / drop a comment below to let me know.

• Fire 

• Fair

• Fail

Thank you for reading.

When you're ready, here are three ways I can help you:

1. Dismantle Your Destructive Mindset Programs: Get the exact blueprint I’ve used not only to unstuck myself professionally and financially but to help hundreds of clients 10X their income, happiness, and fulfillment - for free. ​Get it now​.

2. The Upper Limit Breakthrough Blueprint: Defuse the emotional triggers and dismantle the destructive mindset programs holding you back from living a life full of the money, happiness, and fulfillment you desire and deserve. Coming soon…

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